A Little Christmas Spirit

Ahhhhh, Christmas....

The season that brings out the angry shopper in us all. It's crazy! Wait, let me rephrase that... Women are crazy! I will admit I do occasionally run across a few tragically chosen males sent by their wives (against every manly instinct in their body I'm assuming) to complete those last minute tasks. I only say that because I always catch them in random stores like Bed Bath & Beyond or La Gourmet Chef looking completely dumbfounded. Believe me, I say a silent prayer for each of them for having to endure such madness. That's got to be true love.

They just look so meek and mild, like a little lamb that has lost his flock....only the discovery channel version where the lamb is about to be destroyed by crazed wolves with shopping bags. As a women, if my man hands me a shredded bath towel with someone else's initials on it, I'd find true romance in the effort that went in to getting out alive with that towel. So thoughtful.

There's just something about the holiday shopping deals that provokes this strange form of rage. A quality that seems to lie dormant the other 11 months of the year. Wonder why that is?

Me? Oh no, not me. I'm of course referring to every other woman on the planet. I would never be caught cutting someone off, giving fellow shoppers that dirty don't-mess-with-me-or-this-tinsel-will-be-used-as-a-weapon look, or snatching the last cashmere scarf off the shelf before that little person dressed like an elf could grab it. By the way, I find that wrong on several levels. Santa's got this huge workshop all to himself up north, but yet he sends his "little helpers" south to grab all the good deals. Hoarder.

Overall I'd say my shopping experience this year has remained rather mild. Tolerable and surprisingly successful (I'm thinking that's mainly a result of my online shopping). I've almost finished too! I finally picked up an item for my mother last night that was apparently sold out in every store north of Savannah, but I snagged it (nope, it wasn't that cashmere scarf either).

The other present I haven't received yet is for my sweet sweet boyfriend, Gabriel. I have high hopes that his gift will be arriving sometime today...I hope, I hope, I hope. I mean, what kind of girlfriend would I be if I didn't have a killer gift for my honey on Christmas Day?! We all know he deserves it.

That's one thing I find extremely important during these shopping escapades...a constant. Someone that regardless the horrible shopping language you may use or the snappy (often times intolerable) attitude you maintain, they remain the same lovable person you fell in love with years ago. Now that, my friends, is the truest of love....and I should definitely find one of those guys. ;) hehe... Just kidding, baby!

Seriously, a special thanks is in order for the vast efforts Gabriel has put forth in taming the shrew. I think I've actually learned quite a few things from my Gabriel! How could I not though? The person I spend the most time with is inevitably going to rub off on me. Luckily I have a sexy, thoughtful, responsible boyfriend to share such qualities with...well, that and a three year old (I try to take more qualities from Gabriel than Ellie, but the occasional temper tantrum fights its way through ;)).

Life is good, Christmas is going to be wonderful, and the company I'll be keeping will be no doubt memorable...as most Davis Christmas festivities are.

Merry Christmas!!

Victoria's Secret

As an addendum to my Christmas post, I thought I would add in a special moment I observed while watching one of those unfortunate male scavengers sent on the annual Christmas gift hunt.

I was casually looking through the Victoria's Secret selections at one of our local malls, as normal women who love lingerie do throughout the year, and in my peripheral vision I noticed a man across the room from me searching through the perfume section. This guy was mid-thirties, an obvious home-grown country boy, dressed in camouflage shorts, a long sleeved shirt and a Georgia hat (normal attire for the locals that rarely make it out to the malls). I found no surprise in this shopper, I normally run into several of these guys in Victoria's Secret this time of year and right around Valentine's Day.

I immediately thought to myself, "This will be good." I of course did what anyone looking for a good laugh would do, I moseyed my way a little closer.

As I'm approaching this fella I couldn't help but evaluate the situation, you know, paint a mental picture of what had, is and will happen with this guy. Here he is, hat almost hanging off the back of his head (obviously a product of scratching his head in confusion for the last thirty or so minutes), eyes pointed up in an effort to survey the floor to ceiling perfume displays, and two brightly colored bras in his left hand. He had assumed the position of a bouncer, feet shoulder width apart, chest swollen, and arms securely folded across his chest; no doubt determined to find a particular product.

As I settle into a good observation area a few feet away (I had no intention of offering assistance until he'd spent another fifteen minutes there in confusion), I could practically see the hamster in his head sweating from the intense workout he was getting just trying to keep up with the decision making process.

I have three questions going through my head at this point:

1. Who helped him pick out those bras?... and I sure hope he got some sort of size before he came in here.
2. When was the last time he actually picked out a perfume for this gift recipient?
3. I wonder if he knows he's looking at the men's cologne?

His eyes skimmed across the first row slowly, his mouth dropping a little bit wider with every bottle that passed. Then he made a move. He grabbed the Very Sexy (for men) and puts the top to his nose for a smell. The look on his face quickly expressed his distaste in the product. I hear him whisper to himself, "Smells like a dude."

Interrupting this moment of humor was a woman, obviously an employee, coming to offer the man some assistance. Dang it! Right when it was getting good.

Woman Employee: "Can I help you, sir?"

John Doe: "Yeah. I'm lookin' for this perfume that my wife wears. Smells good. This don't smell real good." He hands the bottle to the woman for her to return it to the shelf.

Woman: "Well sir, this is our Very Sexy fragrance for men."

John Doe: "Well now, that would explain it. Got anything for women?"

Woman: Motioning her hand to cover the majority of the room she replies, "We sure do. Do you have anything in particular you are looking for?"

John Doe: "Hell, I don't know. Somethin' nice (pronounced niiiiiice)."

His eyes continued to inventory the products as he reached for the Heavenly Body Mist.

John Doe: "Mmmmm, that's nice. Looks kinda like that bottle in our bathroom too."

Woman: "This is a very popular fragrance. Would you like the perfume in addition to the mist?"

John Doe: "Mist? Perfume?" ......

Oh yeah, his hamster was officially off the wheel at this point. That just completely threw him off track. The best part was the woman's reaction to the stunned look on his face. She merely picked up the mist and said, "It's ok, we'll just stick with the mist."

Gotta love it!